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Saturday, December 31, 2011

This is how Ryan Fitzpatrick will feel after Sunday

By: Greg
In this version of Patriots Playback we have a drunk Buffalo Bills fan. It looks like he is juking through the Patriots defense and this guy has some amazing moves and a great center of gravity.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Welker's got nice jammies and an even nicer girl friend

By: Greg
Welker is new to twitter and he is already pleasing Pats fans ears and eyes. He recently tweeted this gem....

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Pats vs Dolphins Highlights

What a comeback by the Patriots on saturday. As I always say  a win is a win. The Pats are now one win away from homefield throughout the playoffs.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Patriots vs. Dolphins Preview

By Rocky

Hey, the game is in less than a half-hour—run home from the Ann & Hope right now. Go. You don’t need to get your brother-in-law a waterpik, you got him one last year and the year before that, and you don’t even like the guy, you especially don’t like the way he crosses his legs when he sits. Where does he think he is, on Letterman? And it really bugs you that he never gets up to get you a beer. Fine, in the first year he and your sister were dating he was a guest at your parents’ house for Christmas but now he’s family, he can make a run to the fridge. You know what? Screw him and his non-beer grabbing, oddly crossed-legged sitting position, get him the waterpik (if the line is short or if the checkout girl doesn’t have hoop earrings. The larger the hoops the slower your transaction). Wait, from the way your brother-in-law sits perhaps he has a condition with his legs that makes it difficult for him to walk? Oh you are a jerk. All this time you’ve been stealing sips off his beer—a transportation fee—and he’s a bloody cripple. Better get the deluxe waterpik, the titanium one. And from now on you are pouring his beer into a frosty mug. Oh this is bad karma. And on Christmas Eve of all days. You don’t deserve anything this year. Give everything you get to charity, to a cripple charity. Oh the game, right, running out of time so we’ll make this…dammit the check out girl has hoops and Lee Press-On Nails…the Phins should have beat the Pats earlier in the season, then went on an epic slide and are currently on a nice uptick. We think Matt Moore is a competent quarterback (making him a near-Pro Bowl selection with the group of jags currently under center) and Reggie Bush looks like Ricky Williams, not when he was on the Dolphins but college-Pretty-Ricky-Williams. However who’s more potent on offense than us? Except save the Packers and on any given Sunday, the Saints, nobody. We will win in a Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle, shoot your eye out shoot out. Take the Pats and the points (because it’s not fun to root for a win with no cover) and, no, we don’t need an Ann & Hope credit card, no, we don’t need the waterpik gift-wrapped, we got a game to watch sister!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Playoff Machine: Win Out and Homefield throughout is the Pats

By: Greg
I stumbled upon the ESPN Playoff Machine and played around with it a little bit.  Snooki would know that if the Pats win out they get the number one seed and home field through out the playoffs, which will be key for rest and home field will be big against teams like the Steelers (3 road losses) and Ravens (4 road losses). But as I went on with the machine, I found out that if the Pats trip up against Miami or Buffalo the Pats could find themselves without a first round bye.

Games Left:
Pats: vs Miami, vs Buffalo   
Baltimore: vs Browns, @ Cincy
Steelers: @ Rams @ Browns
Houston:  @Indy, Vs Tenn.

Some scenarios:
  • Pats lose 1 game and Houston wins out, and Either Pitt or Baltimore Wins out the Pats will be the Three Seed
  • Pats lose 1 game, Houston wins one game and Either Pitt or Baltimore Wins out: Pitt or Baltimore would be the number one seed and the Pats would be the number 2 seed
  • Everyone wins out: Pats one seed, Baltimore 2 seed, Houston 3 seed
So pretty much the Patriots need to win out or they will be a 2 or three seed. I expect Houston, Pitt and Baltimore to win out.

Monday, December 19, 2011

God Watching Tebow and His Broncos vs the Patriots

By Rocky

Archangel Michael, clear my docket from 4 o’clock Eastern time on, the Broncos are going to need my help early today. Belichick, Brady and the Patriots are too good for Tebow and Me to come up with just a 4th Quarter miracle.

Sir, with all due respect, there’s more pressing matters. Maybe if we solve more of the world’s crises, then if we have time perhaps we can intervene later in the game?

Horsefeathers. It’s Tebow time.

As you wish sir, but might I add that there are millions of people starving and even the richer countries like the US are having money problems…

Get me John Fox, tell him run Tebow two times, then McGahee once—they won’t see that one coming—, then have Tebow throw the ball—they really won’t see that one coming!

As you wish. Then maybe we can…

Then have Johnson, whoever that is, run it again, then have McGahee get them close. Then, Tebow can take it the rest of the way!

Done. Now about looking in on…

Yes lets look in; is Tebow genuflecting?

Indeed he is Sir but we are getting a multitude of prayers from hospitals all around the world.

Look what you did! You distracted me and now Brady marched them down the field for a touchdown.

Sorry Sir but the prayers…

Prayers! Lets look at the prayers… Hmmm, I see an ark load for Tebow.

Sir, that’s your Spam folder.

My what? Focus Michael, I would like McGahee to run it for 29, then some guy named Ball can loose a yard (as a red herring) and then Tebow throws a duck to Thomas for 32 yards…

Then Tebow runs it in?

No, I don’t want them catching on to me. Then send Ball into the endzone.

Ball, Sir?

I dunno, alphabetically he’s the first name on offense.

But, Sir, that’s a little unbelievable.

Just do it before Edelman meddles.

YesSir. Done. Now about the tumultuousness in Egypt…

OK now we thwart Brady. We take out Brady and this is all ours!

You mean the Broncos, Sir.

Yes, yes, the Broncos.

I meant to ask you, why the Broncos?

I sent Tebow there, despite all odds and reason so he would be closest to heaven. Dallas thinks I watch in on them but I get the best view at Mile High. Speaking of which I need you to intervene and cancel all their road games next year.

Sir, I, you, we have much more pressing things to do right now.

Of course! Force Brady’s passes errant.

OK they are punting now. Can we please look into other issues!?!

Fine, but I’m only doing this so that you’ll stop whining. Does Bieber need help with his Christmas song? How’s Kim Kardashian doing?

Jesus, Sir, can we please do something relevant?

Everybody just asks and asks from me, why doesn’t anyone care about what I want?

Harrumph, the Broncos have the ball back, what would you like to do?

Where are they?

They are at the New England 13, it’s 3rd and 6, Tebow is running it, ah, just shy of the first down.

Then make up a holding penalty to give Tebow another chance.

I did Sir, but Belichick declined it.

That shrewd bastard. Well then have Prater kick it through, Belichick’s hoping to get a stop without a score.

Sir, this just in, we are getting bombarded by Packers fans who no longer believe in You.

That’s not good. I exist on sports fans' faith alone. I already lost contingencies in Jacksonville, Indianapolis and Cleveland thus far. I mean, I saved the NBA’s season what more could they want?

How about we solve a non-sports problem for now? And see if that works.

But it’s almost halftime.

Sir, just one miracle and then we can get back to Tebow, I promise.

Fine. Put the guy from the Buffalo Wild Wings in control until we get back to the game.

Sir, that’s just a commercial.

Seriously? Then we don’t have too much time. Who’s the wickedest person alive? Let’s kill him quickly and then get back to the Broncos.

Kim Jong-Il, Sir.

Phew, that took longer then expected, what’s the score, what quarter are we in?

Umm, don’t smite me Sir, but Brady’s Tebowing it out—41-23 Pats.

Me dammit!

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Deion Branch OUT for Sunday

By: Greg In a surprising move, Deion Branch has been ruled out for Sundays game at Denver. Branch has been bothered with a groin but not many people thought it would keep him out of this sundays game. This injury puts the number two wide receiver position into question. Who will step it up? Is it OCHO CINCO time? Will Underwood have Brady's trust to run the right routes? Will Julian Edelman be thrust into a outside position? We know this means that Wes Welker and the TEs will get a ton of more looks. I would love to see OCHO CINCO step up and get some confidence going into the playoffs.

Patriots lock up Jerod Mayo for 5 more years

By: Greg

The Patriots have made a great move in locking up their best linebacker, Jerod Mayo. The Pats usually let their stud defensive players contracts run up before signing them long term or cutting them loose.

Mayo, despite missing two games in October with a sprained knee, ranks third for the Patriots with 68 tackles this season after a year in which he logged a career-best 175 and was voted to his first Pro Bowl. He was the AP's defensive rookie of the year in 2008- ESPN

Think about past defensive standout players for the Pats like :
  • Assante Samuel: was not re-uped, left for Philly...our secondary has been awful ever since
  • Ty Law: was not extended, look above
  • Richard Seymour: not extended, traded for a 1st rounder, pass rush has been poor since his departure until Mr. Carter came this season
  • Mike Vrabel:
  • Vince Wilfork: Not extended until his contract was up, contract discussions became a distraction and tensions grew
I think this is a great move. The defense has been horrible this year. But this gives the Pats a rock for years to come at middle linebacker. With Big Vince locked up for numerous years, the Pats now have two big pieces to build around.

Patriots Playback: Gronk Time: 10 Min Film about the beast

By: Greg

Came across this mini film about Gronkowski via Youtube and user MrSpotlight27. Check out Gronk's receptions, runs, touchdowns and SPIKES...

All he does is Win...

By: Greg

I admit I love Tim Tebow, love watching him play...but this weekend will be different. The Patriots are stought up front, and weak in pass defense. The only way Tebow will win is if his Passing game is on point.